Where can I buy some fire resistant condoms?

On a related note, I have just developed firecrotch resistant condoms. Each latex sheath is impregnated - if you'll excuse the terminology - with dozenz of box jellyfish stingers connected to a small sensor. The sensor detects if there any hint of ginge in the minge fringe and fires off the stingers. The end result is an instant soft-on, a night in hospital and an instant aversion to firecrotch.